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June 6, 2019
Vol. 14
No. 28

Start Talking with All Students About Consent

At the end of last year, a video of an elementary school teacher greeting a line of children outside of her classroom went viral. As students entered, each one selected the greeting they wanted from the teacher from a poster: a handshake, a hug, a high five, or a simple wave. Soon, another video showing a similar morning routine went viral, and then another and another and another.
These crowd-pleasers aren't just about building connections with students. They're important examples of how to teach children consent, boundaries, and bodily autonomy at an early age.

A "Critical Component" of Education

Sex education is about so much more than just sex. A 4-year-old can learn that he has the right to control who touches him. A 6-year-old can learn the correct names of her body parts, so she is able to more accurately report abuse. We can teach 9-year-olds to understand that they can like a toy regardless of whether it's a "girl's" or "boy's" color.
At Advocates for Youth, where I lead creative programs to educate and mobilize youth, we believe sex ed should start early in a child's life as a critical component of their education, just like math and history. It should include topics like consent, puberty, body image, and healthy relationships. One health class in high school is not enough, and all students—including LGTBQ+ students—deserve to see themselves and their futures reflected in curricula.
Our curriculum is called "3Rs" (Rights, Respect, and Responsibility) and was designed in collaboration with medical professionals to convey age-appropriate information that helps young people develop the essential knowledge they need to navigate growing up. The most important components of sex education include lesson plans designed to help young people delay sex initiation, distinguish between healthy and unhealthy relationships, understand the concepts of consent and bodily autonomy, use protection when they do have sex, and build their communication and decision-making skills.
Advocates for Youth has also partnered with two other sexual health organizations (Answer and Youth Tech Health) to launch AMAZE, a set of animated videos about key concepts for 10- to 14-year-olds, parents, and educators, and amaze jr., a set of videos and resources for parents to watch with their 4- to 9-year-olds. The goal is to create more inclusive, factual, and engaging content to fill in the gaps created by our country's patchwork quilt of sex ed policies.
We work closely with school districts, including schools in Ann Arbor, Michigan; Boston, Massachusetts; Philadelphia, Pennsylvania; Portland, Oregon; and San Francisco, California; to provide implementation trainings for teachers and hear feedback from districts weekly about which lessons they're using in what grades and how relevant the content is to students' lives.
As an educator, you have over 30 years of public health research on your side to promote and expand the education offered in your district. Whether it's through morning greetings, advocating for sex ed curricula that are inclusive and honest, incorporating current events into teachable moments, or hopefully an all-of-the-above approach, educators can play a powerful role in making sure all young people are able to lead safe and healthy lives.

Untangling a Taboo Topic

From YouTube restrictions to misinformation campaigns, the "sex ed for all" mindset faces a great deal of pushback. Sex and sexuality are often coded as taboo topics meant to be discussed in hushed tones. Unfortunately, this can cut off critical conversations before they even start.
When children ask, "How are babies made?" or another question that makes parents spit out their coffee, parents may automatically assume their child is asking about sex. However, from what we know about childhood development, they're more likely questioning their place in the world, according to sexuality education expert Deborah Roffman. These curiosities are less about sex and more about origins. Who are they? What are they supposed to do here? Little kids have big questions and ignoring them only leaves children vulnerable to misinformation.
Young people have questions about sex, bodies, and relationships. If their questions aren't answered by trusted adults, I've heard directly from students that they'll seek answers from hallway gossip, their friends' older brothers, and random Google searches, which don't ensure students get accurate information.

Not Just a "One-Off" Course

In 2017, when Tarana Burke's #MeToo movement was reignited by reports of Harvey Weinstein's history of sexual assault, AMAZE published a video on sexual assault for 10- to 14-year-olds. In a matter of days, we saw a spike of over 100,000 views. We received thousands of comments and messages from young people either disclosing sexual assault or harassment or sharing that they've been thinking about or struggling with these topics.
Just as we don't begin math education by teaching 2nd graders calculus, we shouldn't see sex ed as a one-off course; rather, it is a slow, age-appropriate building of a core foundation. Young people of all ages are searching for guidance on these topics, and it's our job as educators, doctors, parents, and adults to make sure students have the knowledge and confidence they need to make healthy decisions.
References

Matthews, D. (2017, March 6). Call children's private body parts what they are. Psychology Today. Retrieved from www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/going-beyond-intelligence/201703/call-children-s-private-body-parts-what-they-are

Werber, C. (2019, February 5). The case for starting sex-ed conversations with kids at age four. Quartz. Retrieved from https://qz.com/1542767/the-case-for-starting-sex-ed-conversations-with-kids-at-age-four/

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